Rory Breasail's Candidacy Is a Big Fucking Joke

Rory Preparing For His Responsibilities Lobbying the Province and Others, As He Runs for VPX 

The most memorable line from the three debates held on Friday has to go to radical candidate Rory Breasail. “Student financial aid is a big fucking joke”, he insisted, discussing his unrealistic plans for financial reform (free school, no homework, ice cream erreeday, yaaay!). The room laughed, some shocked, others pleased, and some, including some of his supporters, a little disturbed. Understandably so, given that the Vice President External portfolio, for which he’s running, is perhaps the most demanding in terms of professionalism and composure.

From his suits suck t-shirt (which to his credit, was funny… three years ago), to his obnoxious perma-smirk and nervous habit of sipping from his look-at-me-I’m-oh-so-sustainable water bottle during the debate, Rory showed himself for what he is: a silly kid full of [post?] teenage angst, who wants to take out his grievances with “the man” on our dollar.

In the first minutes of the debate, Rory had the gall to speak about his commitment to student interests, and then, in the same breath, to speak of his commitment to “our partners in Gaza”. At least he was honest. Inflaming political tensions by mentioning controversial topics a world away is not just bad policy; it is well beyond the purview of Vice President External and does not represent the interests of UBC students. But this should not be a surprise.

Rory is latest in a dynasty of radical ‘Knollie’ candidates, who, taken together, have offered absolutely nothing to our campus. Offered nothing, while taking so, so, much. Not least of which: our credibility. Like when the Knollie duo President Blake Federick and VP External Tim Chu infamously filed a complaint with the UN in 2009. Of course, the complaint yielded nothing meaningful for students. And the underhanded way the complaint was filed resulted in a costly, but necessary, punitive process that saw both formally censured by the Student Council.  All the while, the escapade took attention away from making progress on student issues.

Rory seems completely incapable and unwilling to do the main job of a VP External: to effect meaningful change for students. Candidates like Rory give university students and bad name, and in doing so diminish our long term ability to lobby seriously for student interests. Lobbying requires research, professionalism, maturity, and a comprehensive set of attainable goals. Rory has none of these.

During the debate, and indeed, during his entire campaign, he has offered no sign to that his tenure would bring anything but heated, counter-productive rhetoric and support for the radical factions with which he so closely affiliates. Rory seems determined to induce a dead heat stalemate with the university (and the province, and the federal government and… everyone less radical than he is).

Rory’s debate comments were sprinkled with his constant references to an underdeveloped and completely undefined ‘us versus them’ narrative. (I would have much preferred they be sprinkled with glitter.) In between bouts of nervous hydration, Rory asked us to “make them earn their money” (referring to the AMS, I think) and later, in reference to financial aid, warned us “don’t let them tell you otherwise”. “Them” in the latter case almost certainly referring to the thousands of secret capitalist agents planted around the university who look and act like normal students and who are notoriously unkind to Rory’s radical ideas.

His is a juvenile narrative more at home in a comic book than a debate. I imagine that’s how Rory sees himself too: a caped crusader bringing radical politics to students – whether they like it or not. But like a super hero without super powers, Rory is impotent. Worse still, he’s not a force for good – at least not as you and I recognize it – he’s a force for his own radical policies that do not reflect the interests of the vast majority of students.

Although his profane exclamation definitely drew the most attention and demonstrated better than anything his opponents said just how coarse and unprepared for the job Rory Breasail is, it wasn’t my favorite line of the night. That honor goes to a comment he made toward the end of the debate, when he mentioned that he has “no desire to pursue a career in politics.” I certainly hope that’s true.

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